Week 20_ On fear, anger, and other uncomfortable addictions…

Could it be that fear and anger be simply like a thermometer? Alerting us that something’s ‘Out-of-Whack’??? Egging us forward to make changes, change directions, or take a stand?

That’s as far as the mind is concerned.

And what if these feelings are just showing up so we can get ‘our fix’?

You know, those pesky peptides to which we’re addicted to?

So our RAS (reticular activating system), that neural network around our brain, looks for situations to be fearful or angry about so we can get a much needed surge of adrenaline and cortisol to appease our body, if only momentarily. In the meantime, submerged in chaos all around us…


When I first heard a few years ago that I created my reality, I did not take it well. Not well at all!

I got, well, very angry and for a while even refused to accept that as a possibility.

I was even told we pick our parents! The nerve! Can you imagine????

Why, oh, WHY, would I have picked my Mother????

Do they deal drugs in heaven???

Ok, I wasn’t angry when I heard that. I was PISSED.

Then the person proceeded to tell me: “But that’s good! Don’t you see? It means you are in control and if you don’t like what’s showing up, you can change it!!!”

I have to admit it took me a while to even be open to hear that without getting rattled.

And wouldn’t you know it, I have been recently heard saying that same thing to others?!


I have to report that as of today, I am perhaps the only human whose had two mothers in one lifetime living in the same body!

I AM So Lucky!!!

Or am I?

Could it be that I took responsibility for everything that’s happened? Especially the ugly, rotten stuff, and made a different choice.

I did. Turns out my Mom is really awesome. She even says she loves me all the time and gives me hugs, even though I’m 50. Heck, she even says she’s so proud of me and thinks I am a lovely person!!

I guess sometimes one has to hit rock bottom, stop feeling sorry for oneself, forgive everything and everyone (especially oneself), and use anger as a ladder to climb back up to the top – leaving the anger behind!

I’ve always said life is a ferris wheel and we should always remember what is was like to be at the bottom and relish when we’re on top, and remember what it is like to be on the top when we’re at the bottom knowing we can always get back up!


16 thoughts on “Week 20_ On fear, anger, and other uncomfortable addictions…

  1. Oh Jana…Well Done…I had my life (rug) pulled out from under me about 7 years ago…I was in such denial…there is no “fetching” way I created this…so much anger! Yep..I did and you know what? I created the life I’m living now! Just Go Figure!


    • Yes, my rug was pulled in 2008…about the same time. Hmmm…
      I was recently told that the people/situations that hurt us the most are our greatest teachers. I got angry when I heard that too!! Hahahahaha
      So I suppose getting angry is not that bad after all…
      Oh, Deb, if we could only grow of our own accord without requiring anger, wouldn’t it be grand!!


  2. Hello Jana…judging from the above comments and my own visceral reaction, Your piece is well, a Master piece!….I like so many of us, have felt exactly as you did about the cards we were dealt at birth. Although I still harbor very dark feelings toward my parents, I’ve come along way with the help of this course….It is so wonderful to read how you have moved BEYOND those negative feelings and anger…A path for us all to follow…Thank you!


    • Thank you so much. It was truly life-changing for me to take responsibility for everything that happens in my life. Then take responsibility of how I react to whatever shows up and to know that I am driving my life. Should I drive it on a beautiful, well-paved, smooth road? Or should I drive it over a cliff? It’s all up to me.
      Also, when I realized that my parents were doing the best they could with what they had, it helped me a lot. They have their programming and didn’t know any better…
      The fact that you’re in this course tells me you are now driving your life and I honor you for your choice!
      Thank you for taking the time to write.
      Will you please tell me your name and your blog, twitter, etc. so I can follow?


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